Harry enters a bordello, run by a certain Luna Lovegood, expecting the Friday night special. Instead, the Weasley brothers plant a sucking violet in the room. Harry gets blue balls and hilarity ensues!
Ron and Hermione decide to test her ‘blood purity’ in the broom closet. As Ron begins the test he realizes that he is stroking Mrs. Norris instead! (wrong pussy)
We meet Willie Widepecker, a famous Hufflepuff, who gave Moaning Myrtle her name.
Snape shows up to the Christmas dance in stiletto heels (LAST year’s design), leather bustier (fringed in feathers) and a smart, but sassy mini-skirt. He says that he has learned to ‘obey the dark lord’.
OJ is tried for the murders of Albus Dumbledore and Sirius Black. He is convicted and sentenced to watching Cagney and Lacey reruns.
Quidditch is banned from the school after the Slytherin team takes the field in the buff, and introduces a new maneuver; the reach around.
Erik Estrada becomes the next headmaster, showing that he knows more about mastering head than anyone on the planet, wizard OR muggle.
6 comments:
The Weasley twins are actually 2 of a set of triplets. The third—Reallie Weasley—has been kept in a Kevlar owl cage ever since she discovered the 'Diarrhoochus' curse during the great toilet paper shortage of ’01.
I perused your splendid site and found (ah!) Shakespeare, Shelley, Tull, and now Potter. As sure as my crack stinks, I will now be a regular reader. After all, we Brits need to stick together and let the world know we’re not just a bunch of pompous, sonnet spewing football hooligans who care more about rock and roll than basic dental hygiene.
Here's a plot line for you:
EAT ME!
Oh my, cowboy! If your worthy rivals (the Soopers?) see that, they may well have something to say regarding your hostility.
Cowboys are bloody plonkers!
Just kidding--it's me, WBSA. Just thought I'd provide cowboy with a bit of a fright. All in good fun, of course.
Snape and the Dark Lord dueled with stiletto heels in a fight over the Pussycat Doll's last feather boa.
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