Friendliness of the people:
Respect for everyone vs. disdain for tourists
Solid edge to Kibungo
Cost:
8 buck for milk vs 60 cent cabs
Another clear edge to Kibungo
Velocity at which food blasts through your digestive system:
Greasy division: Port Lucaya
Spicy division: Kibungo
Women:
Locals in wraps vs tourists in bikinis
No brainer to PL here. In fact, they get 2 for this one.
Roadways:
The K’o drivers are aggressive, but at least they drive on the correct side of the road.
TV:
5 channels vs 3 ESPNs
Edge to PL
Scenery:
Kibungo is beautiful, but everybody knows beaches trump mountains
Wildlife:
Running with zebras vs swimming with dolphins
Tie
Climate:
Cool year round vs ‘What the hell kind of sweat box is this?’
Edge to K’o
Music:
Rwandan music is nice, but, come on, man: PL has kettle drums!
Currency:
Bahamian is interchangeable with US. Still, it doesn’t have gorillas on it.
Aggressiveness of the market sellers:
They’re insistent in PL, but it’s strictly A ball compared to the major leagues of Ko.
Pollution:
Littered beaches vs air that smells like diesel
Edge to PL only because they’re at least making some attempt to clean the beaches
Accents:
French vs understandable
Edge to PL
Winner: Port Lucaya 8-7. They move on to the round of 512.
Showing posts with label diarrhea. Show all posts
Showing posts with label diarrhea. Show all posts
01 March 2010
01 September 2009
Things to do on a Trans-Atlantic Flight
Order a Pepsi. When the attendant tells you they only serve Coke, yell, “Imperialist Swine!” in a thick middle eastern accent.
Try to clear your row by telling people you need the space to simulate the moors in which you typically pray.
When the meal cart comes out, start sniffing loudly and asking the people around you, “Who farted?”
Whenever the pilot talks over the sound system, grab your head and scream, “There’s that voice again!”
Put your paperback in the overhead bin. Tear out one page. When you finish, stand up and get the next page. Continue until the book is finished.
“Accidentally” miss your mouth with your coffee, thereby spilling it on that kid behind you who keeps kicking your seat.
Smear Vaseline all over the seat back. If anyone says anything, explain that you’ll be masturbating later.
When waiting in line for the bathroom, describe your nastiest episode of diarrhea; keep track of how quickly you get to the front of the line. Race your friends.
Blow spit bubbles into the food of the first-class passengers. Tell them you’re part of their in-flight entertainment.
Try to clear your row by telling people you need the space to simulate the moors in which you typically pray.
When the meal cart comes out, start sniffing loudly and asking the people around you, “Who farted?”
Whenever the pilot talks over the sound system, grab your head and scream, “There’s that voice again!”
Put your paperback in the overhead bin. Tear out one page. When you finish, stand up and get the next page. Continue until the book is finished.
“Accidentally” miss your mouth with your coffee, thereby spilling it on that kid behind you who keeps kicking your seat.
Smear Vaseline all over the seat back. If anyone says anything, explain that you’ll be masturbating later.
When waiting in line for the bathroom, describe your nastiest episode of diarrhea; keep track of how quickly you get to the front of the line. Race your friends.
Blow spit bubbles into the food of the first-class passengers. Tell them you’re part of their in-flight entertainment.
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